Big Brother 13; Episode 17: Oh, What A Tangled Web

The house is all a flutter with the return of Brendon the Terrible. Just as Rachel was coming out of her funk surrounding his departure, he win’s the comeback contest against LaGone and in short order makes his presence known. He is determined not to squander this second chance. He’s also going to rub it into Dani and Kalia’s faces, just for grins.
JeJo, Shelly, Rachel and Adam do happy dances in the tarot room while Dani, Kalia and Porsche put in their tombstone orders with the producers. Kalia’s headstone must have her displayed with the wings she planned to use on her way ‘down.’ A combination of smiles and glares rule the evening.

The HOH competition commences with a guessing game. Each HGs home state is represented. Mardi Gras strands lace a tree for Louisiana, baseballs in giant mitts for New Jersey, olives in a giant glass for Florida. Huh? Guess someone forgot about those grapefruits and oranges Floridian farmers harvest. Ok, It’s fair to avoid asking how many gaters are in the swimming pool.

The HG that is farthest from the actual total is eliminated. Down go Rachel, Brendon, Jordan, Jeff and Shelly. Adam is the vet’s only hope. How many rivets are on a propeller representing the Wright Brothers first flight and Jordan’s beloved North Carolina? Adam crashes. The last question is how many California gold rush coins sit in this lovely treasure chest Carol Merrill is showcasing? Dani beats out Porsche and what should have been a celebratory night for the vets minus Dani becomes a complete nightmare on Radford Street. (I know, I know, it’s actually Radford Avenue, but that just didn’t fit.)

In the Candyland room, Dani is surrounded by all of two people, Kalia the lap dog and Porsche the… the… what is it Porsche does in this house? Oh yeah, driftwood.

After the break, we are treated to Shelly interviewing Jordan. Now let’s not get all up in Jordan’s grill here people. The actual interview went on for around 30 minutes and while she may have not rocked the interview strategically, she was honest and it showed. This young woman should seriously be in the running for America’s Choice.

Adam shows up in the HOH and tries to feel Dani up…. shoot…. out. Nothing comes of his effort. Shelly arrives next and after dismissing Kalia from the room, goes full bore after the queen of talk with your mouth full.  Shelly tries to convince Dani she really, really likes her one on one, away from her henchwomen because Dani’s so intelligent, logical, cool, a joy to behold, you know – easily influenced. As usual, Shelly insists she can be trusted.

In a complete turn around in CBS’s representation of Shelly the Omniscient, the truth that this pillar of society has been playing both sides of the BB coin spills out. The other HGs put their heads together with Rachel leading the charge. She’s overheard Shelly making final three deals with JeJo and heard through the grapevine she’s done the same with Dani and Kalia. Oh ratz…. Foiled again. Shelly’s integrity game is falling apart like a 99 cent store pair of jeans.

Brenchel drop by the HOH room to offer Dani a deal they pray she’ll accept. Put up Shelly and Adam. They’ve been useless as game players. Dani can then backdoor Jeff if it comes down to POV, all the while pretending to still hate Brenchel. Dani can barely tolerate this duo, but also sees the wisdom of their offer. Can she set it up to her own advantage?

Shelly is hell bent on verbal revenge against the evil red head and everyone who knows her in the house will believe her because – well because Shelly is this millennium’s version of June Cleaver (provided you ignore the sailor type swearing). As smoke billows from her ears she begins a “Rachel is a liar,” tirade. Shelly’s morals and game ethics are intact, dammit. Cameras? What cameras? As for Adam, he takes it on the chin and admits his own game play fell short . He blew it when he had the chance and doesn’t blame anyone but himself. Two points to Adam.

As the ceremony unfolds, Dani fulfills her quasi deal with Brenchel. Adam and Shelly are now on the block. It is Adam’s third go around and Shelly’s first. Oh she’s fuming. How could Rachel blatantly lie, regardless of the footage displaying the facts? It’s tough to ignore the fact our mom of the year has indeed been playing both sides, all the while perfecting her ego stroking skills. For those who don’t watch the live feeds, this little dream plan has been happening since week two. Shelly does favor JeJo, but has her own eyes on the prize and has admitted she would in all likelihood, switch teams if needed. Alas, all dreams must end and even Shelly must inevitably wake up and face reality. BUSTED.

Dani works out the next few days logically. Brenchel now figure they are safe and won’t try so hard to win POV since they want the noms to remain untouched, sealing Dani’s cool chick, heroine persona. However, if Adam or Shelly win the veto, she plans to backdoor Brendon. Take a lesson here, boys. Never underestimate a woman scorned.